Thursday, April 18th, 2013
For the curious, Sherlock’s excuse for boiling toes in John’s kettle reads:
“…needed to do the experiment in order to solve the Eglantine case! I had to get the toes exactly to boiling without going over, and the kettle was perfect for that since it clicks off by itself, so I could prepare the rest of the experiment without having to watch so closely over the toes. It was absolutely vital to remove the skin intact so I could examine the layers of dermis, and then the subcutaneous fat that melted into the kettle provided the perfect vessel for my analysis of the necessary toxins involved in the murder. It was a fascinating case, the murderer had been injecting minute amounts of toxin between the victim’s toes to simulate inept heroin use, but of course I know what real track marks look like so I wasn’t fooled by the deception. The testing of the boiled fat revealed that they were using the toxin to simulate infection rather than actually poison the victim as the primary cause of death, that was obviously the stab wound, but instead to divert the police’s attention, which of course worked, which is why I had to steal the toes from the corpse when Molly was out getting me some of her awful coffee. You make much better coffee than she does, I don’t know why she’s so inept at it, it’s a simple enough formula. Anyway, once I’d figured out the rather ingenius methodology the murderer’s identity became obvious, and I had to intercept them before they left the country entirely since the Met was too stupid to put a stop on their passport, not understanding that they were the one person who stood to gain the most. It was the cousin, of course, the one who was instructed in the will to go on a free tour of Europe informing the various small publishers of the author’s demise and the change of hands for their publication rights from the author herself to the trust for that charity…”
I feel this is how they came to have the fancy glowing kettle he uses in The Reichenbach Fall. I wrote it all out by hand on the original because I knew the buyer would want it, phew!
Non-Apology, 5″x7″ pen & ink and Copic marker on paper, nfs (sold). But you can get your own apology card here on Etsy.
Above, you can see a close-up photo of his unrepentant face triumphantly explaining how the contamination of John’s kettle helped solve the case. Below, they’re in a frame, and John still looks deeply unimpressed.